Promises

I know your good, but this don’t feel good right now, And I know you think of things I could never think about. It’s hard to count it all joy, distracted by the noise, just trying to make sense of all your promises. Sometimes I gotta stop, remember that you’re God and I am not! So, Thy will be done. I know you see me, I know you hear me, Lord. Your plans are for me, goodness you have in store. -Hilary Scott, Thy Will.

Those words hit me like a ton of bricks during service yesterday! I have been struggling with fear and doubt because of failing a Math test. As a child I was diagnosed with a slight learning disability in math and let me tell you, Satan reminds me of it whenever Math comes up. I know that God is calling me to teach and these tests I have to pass to obtain my degree, one of which I have one more chance to pass before June and it affects my degree plan.  So yeah, a lot of stress and pressure.

But yesterday I found comfort in these words and  today God finally broke through the noise. The first thing I do when I get in my car is turn on the radio. Well this morning was no different except this song came on first via the radio and it took me back to yesterday.  The word promises stuck out so strong. Satan reminded me of my LD again but I was able to remind Him of God’s promises to me: I am a child of THE KING! He knows everything about me, down to every hair on my head! He has good plans for me to prosper and (I saved the best for last) I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH!!

So Satan, you can go back to where you belong because Gods promises to me are stronger than all of your lies!

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Defeated

Yep, that’s the word for today. Today I took the 2nd attempt at a basic skills math test and failed.  Math and I are not friends, never have been. I was labeled, as a child, with a slight learning disability in math. I don’t know if I took that and ran with it but I never went past Algebra in High school. And then because I felt so inadequate I never went on for SAT’s or college. That was until 2007. I have been working on trying to obtain my degrees for almost 10 years now! I know God’s plan is for me to work with children and I love to teach so yes I feel as though God’s plan for me is to be a teacher. I don’t doubt it at all because I know what He has brought me through this far. However, it’s times and events like this that just really knock me down. And boy does the enemy love to jump on me when me when I am down! I can’t wait to be back in the classroom leading the Little’s and even though technically I am about 1 year away from graduation  these tests feel like major mountains that I can’t scale.